slytheringsnake:

my sister just tried to ask me if i wanted to go to bed but instead it came out “Do you need to use the sleep?”

and then she just kinda looked really horrified at herself and whispered

"Maybe i need to use the sleep"

(via sigh-chobabble)

deverse:

my mom meant to post a picture of her dog and posted a picture of a turkey insteadimage

(via sigh-chobabble)

thepartyposse:

kohwala:

do celebrities even snapchat?

there has to be beyoncé rocking the quadruple chin out there somewhere 

(via encourage)

Anonymous: omg if baby oil dissolves condoms what the fuck does it do to babies??? 

the-kellin-under-the-vic:

This may be shocking, but babies and condoms are made of different material

tonydinozzos:

i was just showing my mom how to paste something into her text message on her phone and i was like “double tap in the the text box” “the text box” “the text box” and she was just pointing to random places on her screen that weren’t the text box and all i could think of was

image

(Source: tonydinozzos, via dickkickingrampage)